It's been a strange couple of weeks. I won't go into details out of respect for someone very near and dear to my heart, but I'd be lying if this whole thing wasn't throwing me for a loop. On top of raging hormones, I still have disasociative identity disorder. It is there, and it will be there no matter what's currently happening in my life and this is a fact i've come to terms with. And lately it's been flaring up like a bad case of gout. They call it mental
Forest comes back on the 20th. I can't wait. I always feel like i'm at my best when my brother's around. I am so very excited for the baby boy that's coming. But i'd like to devote this next section to the baby boy's already here. My nephews.
River and I have finally come to a bonding place. I'd say it's perfect timing. you gotta give love to get it with riv, and I know a large part of his life, I just wasn't that much a part of hislife. Now he's graciously letting me in bit by bit and I love all his eccentricities. Medical difficulties and all. In fact I feel that we have a special bond there as well.
Now Liam and I go way back. I actually lived with him for a large part of his baby years (sorry dorothy for all the trouble i was). But something about Liam always brings me back to where I need to be. Very few people can ground me the way he can. Someday I'll get to tell him that by 3 years old he'd already saved my life multiple times. Before i became pregnant myself, I seriously doubted my ability to have children, also doubted that the love for my nephews could possibly even come close to being topped by another child. I am so excited for everett to meet his cousins, and for me to meet the most likely spitfire personality he will have.
I guess the moral of the story is, no matter how irritating 5 am bedtimes can be, it is one night closer to meeting my baby.
i am so excited for everett to meet you. you are one of the bravest women i know. and i love you.
ReplyDeleteLove you Linda
ReplyDeletethank you cousins. I love you both!
ReplyDeleteWow. Youre amazing. We need to talk more often! You will be a wonderful mother!
ReplyDelete-viviana
I love you linda. I was reading thru some of our old letters. I miss you and u are going to b an amazing momma :)
ReplyDelete