I started last Monday as a housekeeper at the motel 6. I hadn't worked since i was still pregnant and I'd forgotten just how much having multiple personalities interferes at the workplace. They want me to remember specific room numbers, how many beds were in them, etc. etc. It should be simple, but it isn't. I'll be asked if i've done a specific room and i have no idea without looking at the clipboard where i write down all this information. I've walked into clean rooms I already did twenty minutes ago. And I'm not even having a big problem with disasociating right now. This is just normal. I have to conquer conflicting urges. GO faster, get it over with, take your time, sit on the floor and look at the bug, smoke a cigarette. It's hard to block all that out and just do my job but i can do it. It might take me a little longer, i might do things different than you, but I do it. I am still capable.
My son is staying with my mom and sister for the time being. He comes home on weekends and I try to see him as much as possible. I don't feel guilty or wrong or anything some people might want me to feel. I know I am doing the right thing for Everett. It's not the cookie cutter life, but there is nothing about me that is even remotely cookie cutter. My babys doing great and healthy and happy. How I choose to raise him is how he needs to be raised, it just looks different.
I guess what I'm trying to say is, maybe they have tattoos and piercings, maybe they're illegal immigrants, maybe they have mental illness, maybe they're gay, or transgender, either way we're all just trying to make it, same as everybody else, so before you judge remember, we're all the same, we just look different.
